Baby's Turning 1!

Petra is turning one soon!

I'm not going to say, "I can't believe it's been a year already", or "wow, she's so big now", or any of that but I will say this: I can't believe what a difference a year makes.

I read the books, I had a baby sister, I had been a babysitter, I had friends who had babies and I thought I was ready but I wasn't even close to ready but
I'm so glad for the experience.

I'm so glad to have such a sweet baby but man - what a year. And to all my friends and relatives who are nodding their heads and saying, "I told you so"... I doubt that you had any idea when it hit you either. Oh and ps. I'm already that person, nodding politely when a pregnant woman tells me she's ready for the baby and I'm thinking - girl you don't have a clue.

If they say that a baby is your prize for labour and delivery, then a one-year old is definitely your prize for a confusing/frustrating/exhausting/humbling year.

The Highway of Heroes

Yesterday I was driving home, dancing to the music on the radio (because it's a great way to unwind at the end of the day) and I noticed a collection of about 20 people overhead waving at the passing cars and carrying flags. I remembered that some Canadian soldiers had died recently and realized they must be coming home.

I couldn't stop thinking about them 'coming home' and how it wasn't the homecoming their family dreamt of, it kept playing in my head and then at the next overpass there was a collection of people, and again at the next overpass. Suddenly I couldn't stop crying. 

I don't personally know anyone serving overseas right now but I started thinking about these soldiers' families, my own family, and I was overwhelmed. I think it's because I'm a mom. I never really thought about my own mortality until I was a mom. 

Anyone else noticing more than wrinkles with age? Anyone been struck by the feeling that we won't live forever?

Momma Tip

I don't know if you'll find this good or gross but... my hairstylist suggested that I style my hair with mousse in the morning to get an extra day out of a washing. Since mousse has alcohol, it absorbs your hair oil and it won't look greasy. Great for a working mom.

Menu Planning

I've always loosely planned our weekly meals and enjoyed the flexibility of grabbing groceries anytime or ordering as a back up plan. Now that I'm back at work grocery shopping time is very limited and since Petra is eating real food, I actually have to have real food ready for her. 

Since I've been back to work, I've created a new normal. During the week I rush out of the office to pick my daughter up, get her home for dinner/bath/bed, and that's it - there isn't time for shopping or even a stop at the gas station. 

Last week was a struggle of putting together awful meals from the fridge. By Friday I had decided it was time to formalize a meal plan. I started by writing down a list of our favourite meals, then I made a shopping list, then I checked an online flyer for deals, and then did the shopping. I know it's really simple but it's new to me and I think it'll work for us. The beauty of a meal plan is that I also know what prep to do the night before if necessary. 

Am I really late in this whole menu planning thing? Are you all doing it already?

Shame on Me

I'm the mom who went on maternity leave, started a blog, and then abandoned her blogger responsibilities and I apologize for that.

About a month ago, I took a new position at a large telecommunications company. I finally started on Monday. The transition from mom-on-leave leading a life of leisure to a working mom has been interesting. I didn't want to write about it while I was experiencing it because I was a mess of emotion. I'm not saying I'm behind it but I do have better perspective today. 

I'm lucky to have an excellent support network around me. My sister-in-law helped on the first day by picking Petra up at the end of the day, and offering to take her every single Monday. And our childcare provider is fantastic, sending me daily reports and pictures of the baby's day. And my husband is handling all drop offs. 

I went back early (during the 10th month of a potential 52 week leave) and I'm definitely feeling some guilt about that. Petra is finally, after four days, looking like she's adjusting to the first major change of her life. I needed to go back to work. I love working, always have, it's fundamental to the kind of person that I am and I didn't want to return to my previous employer. The one major surprise was the way I started to lash out at the job when things weren't going smoothly. I started to think the job wasn't worth making Petra so upset. Now that she's better, I feel entitled to enjoy working again. I know this is just the first tug in a longer battle that I'll constantly face as a momma but I feel like I've leapt a large hurdle this week. 

Anyone else working through going back early? Or feelings you didn't expect?

Things that make you go hmmm...

My old boss at Ryerson posted this link on facebook. I couldn't believe what I was reading, but then thought about the world in general, and thought, "okay, I could see people being ridiculously ridiculous like this". 

What do you think about it?

Cooking Resources

I have a few trusted cooking resources. Three are cookbook and one is a website. I check these when I'm meal planning, party planning, recipe testing, and when I'm trying to decide what to bring to a potluck lunch.

The cookbooks are: 

How to be a Domestic Goddess: Baking and the Art of Comfort Cooking - Nigella Lawson

Friday Night Dinners - Bonnie Stern

The Joy of Cooking - Irma S. Rombauer

And the website is recipezaar.com, although I do use epicurious and allrecipes sometimes too. Do you have a favourite, couldn't-live-without-it cooking or baking resource?